Saya baru perasan, bila badan tak berapa sihat, maka akal saya juga tak berapa rasional. And then, estrogen will start to kick me upside the head and eventually made me... cry.
And I feel stupid when it does.
You know it's when you really feel sudden heaviness on your chest, that you need to release. Then ceria-ceriakan hati baca blog orang, baca dia divorced dan ada gambar kecurangan husband kat blog tuh, huh, tetiba jer terus nangis. Tengok nasyeed kat youtube, pun nangis. Pegi basuh muka, masih lagi nangis.
As if it wasnt humiliating enough, my husband came back right in the middle of me-against-my-inner-feeling war. Gosh~ he SHOULD be the last person to see me in this state of weakness. I mean, he WOULD and COULD never understand why on earth would a woman shed tears, without a solid reason (coz i think a digital person like him would put it that way)...for he had no other woman in his life, other than me, thus he would never know that it isnt easy being a woman. Sometimes when the hormone takes in, all the strength that you've been building all these times would crumble.
My head is still throbbing and pulsing to some kind of chaos beats. I dont feel good, i dont feel really well either, not that im not healthy, i just, not feeling ok.
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Saya baru tau Habib Umar datang UIA Januari lepas. Bertuahlah menjadi lelaki, dapat cium bau waris nabi, dapat jalan seiring dengan jejak ahlil-bait, dapat cium bau-bau syurga...Dapat lihat wajah keturunan kekasih-Nya dari dekat
He is al-Habib ‘Umar, the direct descendant to the Prophet Muhammad SAW (PBUH), through Hussain the grandson, the son of both ‘Ali the son of Abu Talib and of Fatimah al-Zahra.
-Sources-
Thursday, February 18, 2010
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6 Whisperers:
zakiah jangan sedih sedih.. akak pun ada masa sedih juga...ada sekali tu buat tu salah buat ni salah..abg faiz yang jd mangsa (kene pujuk)..
masa tgh nangis teresak esak tu akak cakap pd abg faiz..akak sorang2 kat sini dan apa2 terjadi akak just harap abg faiz jer sentiasa ada kat sisi...huhu memang emo sikit...
So jangan sedih sedih lagi kay...
sian dia...mungkin emosi orang tengah membawa kot...kengkadang anak punya nakal pun boleh wat rasa nak nangis...bila hubby buat tak layan pun rasa nak nangis...tapi saya rasa sebab awak sedang berada pada tahap hormon estrogen yang tinggi pada saat ini...jadi..banyakkan rehat dan happy selalu kay..
akak,
thanx a lot, that is really helpful.. Terharu sangat. Rasa macam lega ada orang yang memahami. Tak sangka bukan saya sorang yang rasa penat n almost give up macam nih. Saya penat.. Hontouni Tsukareta. Oyasashi okotoba wo hontouni, hontouni arigatou. Tasukarimasu.
Erin,
memang pembawaan jugak. Saya tak boleh tidor sangat kali nih, sakit belakang + penat + ...macam2. Rasa macam nak lari balik Mesia..haha. Esok dapat rehat puas-puas kut :)
zack.. agaknye bulan febuary ni bulan penuh ngan emo..hehehh..saya pun rasa ada rasa cam give up, nak marah2, sedih. huhuhuhuhu..tp nasib baik mr. laling bnyk bg support.
r u carrying a boy? people said pregnant with boy mmg beban lebih skit, in terms of guna calori byk, plus the hormon changes, badan pon membara je, (i used to mandi pagi2 buta sebab panas giler padahal tido dlm air cond dah) emosi pon mudah terganggu..
when i was pregnant dulu, hubby tak nak pegi jusco sale pon dah nangis2 mcm apa je..rasa mcm tak disayangi semua..mmg emo giler la..
then now dah beranak pulak, bila hari2 yg sgt mencabar jaga anak tu, mmg cepat je nangis dan mengamuk..bila ada break time (read: anak nap) baca benda2 apa skit mula la meleleh air mata, tgk citer sedih skit pon rasa menusuk ke hati je..
i believe it's the women mechanism when coping with too much of challenges, we cry..heh!
misah,
bulan february nih pun hectic jugak untuk korang kan? sian juga..takper misah, kita buat one step at a time. good luck utk korang jugak :)
mq,
betul ker? klu carry boy macam tuh yer? sekarang memang panas..winter tapi tak pakai blanket pun. bab emo tuh pun memang tak leh tahan..kadang2 diri-sendiri pun rasa pelik tapi..memang cannot control..hehe, tq very-very-very for this clarification, at least i feel very much relief sebab dh tau punca..haha. ingatkan dah lost sanity dah :P
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